Echoism

Undoubtedly you are familiar with narcissism. The narcissistic character presentation is based on a Greek myth about a young man named Narcissus and a young lady by the name Echo. We have all heard about Narcissus but Echo has remained silenced.

Mythology is a dramatic way of teaching morality; of how to act in the world. From the self-obsessed, handsome Narcissus we learn we would end up dying alone, without any meaningful relationships and connections in life, if we are only concerned with ourselves. (Narcissus died by looking into his own reflection in the water, and being so captivated by it that he could not move away from the image to eat and drink to sustain his life.)

The other - just as significant - side of the moral is about Narcissus' counterpart Echo. Echo is who we would call today an empath, people-pleaser, or codependent. Echo is other-obsessed. Self-obsessed people attract other-obsessed people, and vice versa. Echo was enamored by the handsome Narcissus and captivated by his charming presence.

Prior to meeting Narcissus, Echo was cursed by a goddess to only be able to repeat the last two words of another person, rather than having her own voice. Echo lacked a 'self' and could only be like a chameleon. In contrast, Narcissus did not lack a 'self' but was in fact full of himself! Echo was desperate for Narcissus' acceptance but he rejected her - feeling disgusted with her.

Echo felt hurt by the rejection but never ceased to crave and long for Narcissus. She turned into lifeless stone and only her empty echoing whispers remained, circling around in caves.

Both Narcissus and Echo suffered a tragic death. The moral is not only that self-obsession is unwanted but that other-obsession is equally dangerous and pathological. The fact that Echo is unheard of, even though she plays an equally important role in the myth, is a perfect representation of her plight.

Do you feel voiceless? Do you only echo what other people say, in the hope of being accepted? Do you long for people who repeatedly and painfully reject you? Have you given up the sustenance of your own life for the sake of being with someone else? Are you silenced and unheard? Do you lack a solid sense of self?

You might be living with the same "curse" as Echo, and interpret your character presentation as echoism.